How to Help a Friend Who's Struggling

What if the most important thing you could do for a friend is also the scariest? Most teens who get help for a substance problem say they wish a friend had said something sooner. You have more power than you think. Knowing what to do when you're worried about a friend is a skill, and it's one you can learn right now.

It’s hard to watch a friend struggle. You might feel confused, scared, or unsure what to do. The most important thing to remember is that you don't have to solve their problems. Your job is to be a good friend, and sometimes that means getting an adult involved.First, learn to spot the signs. A friend might be struggling if you notice:Sudden changes in their personality or friends.Losing interest in things they used to love.Grades dropping or skipping school.Being secretive or lying a lot.Frequently borrowing money or having none.It’s crucial to understand the difference between a normal secret and a dangerous secret. A friend's crush is a secret you keep. A friend using drugs is a dangerous secret that you must share with a trusted adult. Telling an adult isn’t “snitching.” Think of it li...

Olivia, 13, knew something was wrong with her best friend, Daniela. Daniela had been skipping soccer practice, which she used to love, and was hanging out with a new group of kids. When Olivia saw her, Daniela just seemed... off. Olivia tried asking, “Are you okay?” but Daniela just said, “I’m fine, don’t worry about it.” But Olivia was still worried. She felt torn, like she was betraying Daniela's trust. Finally, she decided to talk to her school counselor. She explained what she’d noticed and said she was scared for her friend. The counselor listened and promised to check in with Daniela discretely. A week later, the counselor told Olivia she did the right thing. Daniela wasn't using substances, but she was dealing with a serious family problem. Getting help early made all the difference...