English Language Arts
Grade 12
15 min
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Introduction & Learning Objectives
Learning Objectives
Differentiate between higher-order concerns (HOCs) and lower-order concerns (LOCs) in a peer's analytical essay.
Formulate specific, actionable, and constructive feedback that addresses the writer's argument and use of evidence.
Suggest revisions that enhance thematic complexity by applying principles from a specific critical lens (e.g., post-colonial, feminist).
Propose improvements to stylistic voice, syntax, and diction to better align with a formal, academic tone.
Use structured feedback models, such as the 'I notice, I wonder, What if...' framework, to guide their commentary.
Evaluate the effectiveness of a peer's integration of primary and secondary source material and suggest revisions for greater synthesis.
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Key Concepts & Vocabulary
TermDefinitionExample
Higher-Order Concerns (HOCs)Big-picture issues that affect the entire essay, such as the thesis statement, argument, organization, evidence, and analysis. These should always be addressed first.A reviewer noting that the thesis statement is a summary rather than an arguable claim, or that a body paragraph lacks sufficient analysis of its textual evidence.
Lower-Order Concerns (LOCs)Sentence-level issues, including grammar, spelling, punctuation, word choice, and formatting. These are important but should be addressed after HOCs are resolved.Pointing out a comma splice, a misspelled word, or an error in MLA citation format.
Constructive CriticismFeedback that is specific, supportive, and focused on improvement rather than simply pointing out flaws. It explains the �...
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Key Rules & Conventions
The HOCs-First Hierarchy
Address Higher-Order Concerns before Lower-Order Concerns.
A perfectly grammatical essay with a flawed argument is still a flawed essay. Always start your review by focusing on the thesis, structure, and analysis. Save comments on spelling and punctuation for the final stage of your feedback, as sentence-level issues may disappear entirely if a paragraph is rewritten.
The 'I notice, I wonder, What if...' Framework
Structure feedback as observations, questions, and possibilities.
This model promotes a collaborative, non-authoritative tone. Start with a neutral observation ('I notice you use the word 'power' several times in this paragraph'). Follow with a question ('I wonder if you are connecting this to a Foucauldia...
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Challenging
A peer has integrated a quote from a literary critic. Their analysis following the quote simply rephrases what the critic said (e.g., 'In other words, as the critic argues...'). Which piece of feedback is most effective for encouraging greater synthesis of source material?
A.You've paraphrased the critic well, but you need to add your own idea.
B.This is a good quote, but you should find one that is easier to explain.
C.You've accurately summarized the critic's point. To achieve greater synthesis, could you now put that point into conversation with your own argument? For example, show how the critic's idea can be extended to support your claim about a different character, or identify a nuance the critic might have missed.
D.You should not explain what the critic means; the quote should speak for itself.
Challenging
A peer is writing a post-colonial critique of Shakespeare's *The Tempest*. Their thesis is: 'The play shows the relationship between Prospero and Caliban.' Following the principles in the tutorial, what is the most effective revision suggestion?
A.This is a good topic, but your thesis needs to be a full sentence.
B.You should also mention Ariel in your thesis.
C.This is a factual statement. To make it an arguable post-colonial thesis, what if you focused on a specific technique? For example: 'Shakespeare's depiction of Caliban's language—initially taught by his colonizer and later used to curse him—dramatizes the complex and paradoxical role of language as both a tool of colonial oppression and a means of native resistance.'
D.You need to explain the historical context of colonialism in your introduction.
Challenging
You are reviewing an essay that argues Jean Rhys's *Wide Sargasso Sea* is a well-written prequel to *Jane Eyre*. The essay primarily summarizes Rhys's plot. What is the most critical sequence of feedback you should provide, according to the tutorial?
A.First, praise their detailed summary. Second, suggest they add a paragraph on Rhys's biography. Third, fix their comma splices.
B.First, identify the thesis as a non-arguable summary (a major HOC). Second, suggest reframing the argument through a post-colonial or feminist lens to analyze *how* Rhys actively 'writes back to' and subverts the colonial and patriarchal assumptions of Brontë's original text.
C.First, correct the formatting of the book titles. Second, tell them to add more quotes from *Jane Eyre*. Third, check the conclusion.
D.First, tell them their argument is unoriginal. Second, suggest they choose a different novel. Third, point out their spelling errors.
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